


The Alpha Within: The Talk to Change a Life

by ChrisVD



Series: The Alpha Within [2]
Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Anorexia, Depression, F/M, M/M, Other, Self-Harm, Triggers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-14
Updated: 2014-09-14
Packaged: 2018-02-17 07:58:39
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,469
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2302355
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChrisVD/pseuds/ChrisVD
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Derek talks to Stiles. Lydia is attacked by an OC (the only one I plan on making, though don't hold me to that). Scott's an idiot (still). Stiles goes to Danny for some much needed help.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Alpha Within: The Talk to Change a Life

**Author's Note:**

> Again this is un-beta'd. All mistakes are my own. I do not own Teen Wolf or it's sexy characters. This chapter is a little shorter than the last. I wont start the next one until tomorrow. Please leave a comment. Enjoy!

I open my front door. I hear the basketball game my dad recorded last night. As I walk by the front room, I say ‘Hi’ to my dad. Shortly after that, I walked upstairs to my room. When I opened the door, I was greeted to the sight of Derek, Scott, Liam, and Malia sitting around my room with serious looks on their faces. I stuck my head out of the room and yelled down to my dad, “I’m not that hungry dad, I think I’m gonna skip dinner!” “Stil-,” Malia starts but I interrupt her. “Derek, I thought you coming alone. I didn’t bring enough hairbands to braid everyone’s hair.” “Stiles, we’re all concerned for your health,” Liam says. It’s obvious he doesn’t want to be here. “I hardly think that my health classifies as your concern, Liam.” “Will you please just sit and listen to us without deflecting every damn thing we say,” Malia asked with more anger than she probably intended for. The first words spoken since our breakup, and they’re a command. Great. “Fine, but I’ll have you all know that I’m skipping curly fries for this.” “Like you’d eat them anyway,” Scott says with venom in his voice. “Wow. Rude,” I reply. I settle into my computer chair. This is going to be a long talk.

“Stiles, why haven’t you been eating,” Derek asks. Everyone looks at me like I just killed an old woman. So much anger. “I haven’t been hungry. Next,” I ask trying to avoid discussion about my personal health. “Why have you been wearing the flannels? It’s way too hot for them,” Scotts the next one to interrogate me. I want to lie. I want to tell them it’s because they’re comfortable, but that’d be a lie. They’re actually really uncomfortable in the summer heat. They’d see right through my lie. “I wear them because I don’t want to question me about my body.” That’s not a lie, but it’s not the whole truth. “What about the scars,” Derek asks staring into my soul. Of course he had to mention the scars. Everyone looks shocked. “What scars,” Liam looks more confused than concerned. “Stiles…,” Malia started but Scott walked over to me and grabbed my arms. I tried to escape his grasp but it was in vain. He turned my arms over and lifted my sleeves. It was obvious that these scars were self-inflicted, and they marked the entirety of both of my arms.

“Care to explain,” Scott asked with so much anger that I thought he’d lose control and wolf out. I remained silent. How do I tell my best friend that I cut myself because of countless nightmares? How do I explain the endless feeling of uselessness? What words do I use to explain that it’s the only way I can escape panic attacks? I don’t think I can say anything. “Stiles! Tell me why you did this,” he yelled as he shook my arms. All of a sudden there’s a lump in my throat and tears blur my vision. Before I embarrass myself further I say, “I just can’t. I’m so sorry.” I flee to the bathroom.

Once in the bathroom, I lock the door. I fall to the floor in an ugly, tearful, sobbing mess. I stay like that for a while. Eventually, I don’t know how much later, I hear a knock on the door. “Please just leave me alone. I don’t want to talk.” I was surprised that Scott wasn’t the one to reply. “Stiles? Look I’m sorry that we all ambushed you like that. Scott found out about our talk from Kira and he staged the whole thing. I didn’t know until he showed up. I made them all leave, and you’re dad got called in to work. Can you please come out and talk to me,” Derek sounded genuinely apologetic.

After drying my eyes on some toilet paper and throwing it away, I got up and unlocked the door. Now that I get a better look at Derek, I notice he looks like he hasn’t slept in days. His hair looks like he’s been running his hands through it. “Stiles…,” Derek says with a sigh, ”I-“ I didn’t let him finish. I hugged him. His only response, aside from an ‘oomph’, was to hug me back, though awkwardly. “Can we please just talk. No sarcastic quips, no attacking me. I just need to talk,” I say as I release him from the hug. “Okay. We can talk, though I’d prefer to do so in the front room, and not in the hallway.” I laughed. It sounds a little hysterical. Derek doesn’t seem to mind. We make our way to the front room in awkward silence. Once there Derek sits on the recliner, and I sit on the couch. We’re silent for a long while. I finally gather my courage to speak. “I think I should start with what caused all of this. After the Nematon, well the Nogitsune really, I started to feel the darkness Deaton warned us about. It wasn’t very strong, but it was there. After the whole Allison thing, everybody was mourning. They had the right to. Soon after the mourning period, Scott met Kira and left me behind. It didn’t feel right to burden them with my problems. I mean yeah I killed people, and I was fucked up, but that does not excuse ruining their happiness. I started having these panic attacks, and I couldn’t calm down. None of my techniques worked. I once tried to drink water to calm down, but the glass slipped and shattered. When I went to clean up, a shard cut my palm and focusing on the pain brought me out of my panic attacks. I have panic attacks often, so I cut often. Every time I eat I get sick to my stomach. I have no clue as to why, but I just can’t eat. Then there’s the nightmares…”

“Nightmares,” Derek asked in shock. I couldn’t bring myself to look him in the eye. “They started after we killed the Nogitsune. I killed people, Derek! I was possessed by an ancient evil fox spirit. I killed people. I see them every night. All of the people I killed.” When I finally looked at Derek, he looked- he looked- guilty? “How many hours a week are you able to sleep, Stiles?” “I don’t know,” I reply. “Stiles…,” He says in warning. “I get about 4 hours of sleep a week.” “How were you able to sleep through the night last night?” I didn’t think about that. Why was I able to sleep through the night? It certainly wasn’t because Derek was there, was it? “I honestly don’t know,” I reply, though I’m exhausted from today’s events. “Until we find a way for you to sleep, I’m staying here. I’m sure the Sheriff won’t mind. I also want all of your blades. All of them. You will be eating at least two meals a day. It doesn’t need to be much, but you need the nutrients and vitamins. You need to get better,” Derek said with determination. “Derek.” “What, Stiles?” “Why do you care so much about this,” I asked out of curiosity. Wait. Is Derek Hale blushing? It must just be the lighting. There is no way Derek Hale is blushing. “You’re pack. I care about our pack.” “Oh. Okay.”

Derek makes me eat a Cesar Salad for dinner, along with a protein shake. Then he made me walk him around the house and hand him my blades. After that he made me do my homework, and asked me to go to bed around 10 o’clock. I lie down and then I feel Derek lie down beside me. There’s space between us, but I fall asleep easier. It feels like the weight of the world has been lifted from my shoulders.

When I woke up, I realized that Derek was spooning me again. “Uh. Derek?” “Hmm,” he sounded tired. “Are you awake?” “No,” he replied gruffly. That’s when I felt it. “Well, uh, some parts of you are.” He quickly rolled onto his back, and bolted upright. Rubbing the sleep from his eyes he says, “I’m so sorry.” I chuckle. “Dude, don’t worry about it.” He just glared at me. “Don’t call me ‘Dude’, Stiles.” Last night’s events replayed in my head. “Oh! Derek, if you ever baby me again, I’ll rip your throat out…. With my teeth!” I smiled and left to go shower.

After my morning ritual, I went to my room to get my clothes. “Actually. Derek, you’re gonna leave my room so that I can change.” “That’s not going to happen, Stiles.” I raised my eyebrows at him. “Ok then! I guess you’ll just have to watch me change,” I say hoping to get him to leave me be. “You don’t have the nerve,” he replies as if he knows I wouldn’t. “Really, now?” He looks up from his book with an expectant look. Not expecting, but daring. He’s daring me to change in front of him? I don’t know why I do it. I don’t know where this surge of body positivity came from, but I turn towards my closet and drop my towel. I hear Derek gasp from his spot on my bed. I laugh as I put on my boxers. After getting dressed I turn around to see Derek looking as surprised as I’ve ever seen him. That makes me laugh even harder. “Told you,” I say as I grab my backpack. “Oh and you can use the front door,” I say with a smirk as I leave my room. Did I just flirt with Derek Hale? Did I just get naked in front of Derek Hale? This will prove to be interesting.

Derek enters the car as I put the key in the ignition. I feel my cheeks heat up. He doesn’t notice I’m blushing. If he does, he’s nice enough not to mention it. As we pull out of the driveway, my phone starts ringing. My ringtone is Bang Bang by Ariana Grande, Nicki Minaj, and Jessie J. If I wasn’t blushing before, I am now. “Uh, can you answer that? I’m driving.” Derek grabs my phone with a smirk, which fades when he reads the caller id. “Who is it,” I ask with concern. He answers the phone. “Lydia Martin! To what do I owe this honor?” I can hear the high pitch of Lydia’s voice through the speaker, but can’t make out what she’s saying. “A were-what?” That catches my interest. “Put her on speaker.” Derek does as I asked. “Lydia? You’re on speaker,” I say to inform her of my presence. “Stiles! Someone attacked Danny and I last night. It was a shifter of some sort. It was definitely a sea creature of some sort.” I slowed to a stop at the red light. Derek must’ve been able to see the realization in my expression. “What is it, Stiles,” he asks. “Lydia, do you have a picture,” I ask avoiding Derek’s question all together. “I just sent it to you.” I opened my messenger app, and the attachment. Crap. “Stiles, do you know what that is,” Lydia asks after a moment. “Lydia, have someone call Deaton. Tell him we have a Were-Cetus running around town. Meet us at the clinic immediately,” I say as I change my course. Derek hangs up the phone. “Looks like I’m not going to school today.”

We arrive to the clinic, and I pull in to the nearly empty parking lot. The only other vehicles are Scott’s bike, Lydia’s car, Deaton’s car, and Danny’s car. We rush into the clinic through the back door. Everybody’s there, spare Deaton. “Deaton’s dealing with a client, but he’ll be in here soon.” My mind flashed back to the night I stabbed Scott here. I quickly shook that thought from my head, as Deaton entered through the metal door.

“So we have a Were-Cetus on our hands,” he says as more of a question than a statement. “A Were-what,” Scott asks too confused for his own good. “It’s called a Were-Cetus. It’s one of very few. Cetea are sea monsters that look like sea serpents. They are usually shown in Greek Mythology and Greek Art. A Cetus must have reproduced with a human of some sort in order to create a shifter,” I say, because (other than Deaton) I’m the only person who knows what the hell I’m talking about. “It seems to be alone. I don’t see a reason for it to be in Beacon Hills, other than the whole beacon thing,” Liam says. “I know who it’s after,” Malia says. Everybody goes still. “It’s after Stiles,” she says with an expression of guilt. “Why? Wait, how do you know,” Deaton asks. Malia is quick to reply, “When possessed by the Nogitsune, Stiles killed a lot of people.” All of a sudden a million emotions rushed over me. The biggest one was guilt. “Yeah. I know. Thanks for reminding me,” I struggle to say past the lump on my throat. “One of those people wasn’t a person. You killed a Were-Cetus, Stiles,” Malia says as she avoids looking me in the eye. “How do you know,” Derek asks expression full of rage. Malia pulls out her phone. The display shows a picture of her apartment window. Smeared in blood is the sentence ‘The Stilinski boy will pay’. “This is just great. I have an ancient sea serpent after me. Best of all, it can disguise itself in plain sight! After this will there be a Were-Harpy? Ooh no maybe we should find a Mormo spirit to possess me,” I say sarcastically. “Stiles-,” Scott starts. “No! Screw you. Screw this. I’m done,” I say as I throw my hands in the air in mock surrender. I storm out of the clinic blinded by rage.

I hop in my jeep, and speed out of the parking lot. I drive home as fast as legally possible. As I pull into my driveway an idea comes out of right field and slams into my head. I pull out my phone and call Danny. He picks up on the fourth ring. “You can’t copy my Physics notes, Stilinski,” he says as soon as he picks up. “Woah, calm down. First of all, I didn’t call for that. Secondly, Hello to you too.” He’s silent for a moment. “Wait, then what did you call me for?” People think so little of me. “I need to get laid. Take me to a club, and get me laid.” Maybe that’s why. “Oh, okay! Meet me outside Jungle in an hour!” “Sure thing,” I say as I hang up. Oh crap. I have to go get ready.


End file.
